Tuesday, November 15, 2016

Several Nights More Hellish Than Usual in Hell and Albertsons Falsely Accuses Me of Shoplifting,

After several nights of getting about three hours of sleep due to a bunkmate who shakes the bed and gets up and down many times from between two and three AM until just before time to get up when she goes back to sleep I am ill, exhausted and in lots of pain. There is also the emotional abuse from some of the shelter staff that has greatly contributed. Every night at lights out the bunkmate and another woman in the dorm yell and exchange insults at each other. Then there is all the other noise in the dorm, people actually talking on cell phones after lights out when people are trying to sleep. Who would do that you ask, well there are many there who would. I often can't believe what is going on but I hear it and see it. Texting or reading something on a cell phone is not a problem all night long if they don't flash the light around (student staff have done this), but all sound should be turned off. That is just common courtesy but many completely lack it. Last night before lights out it was just nuts in the women's dorm, yelling, singing, someone playing some show loudly. Some were trying to sleep and some were trying to read. Add to this the ones who have not bathed in a long time and have dirty clothing on so their body odor is wafting everywhere. I don't like to report the problem behaviors so people don't lose their beds, so try to talk to them. After several nights of the continuing problem and now I'm ill and being told to shut up when trying to act like an adult and talk to them I no longer care.

Last night was really bad and I did tell staff that came in the dorm. She said it was the super full moon and they were having problems in other places. I do believe in the full moon effect having been an RN in ER and critical care. However, the main problem is the mix of people who are now in the dorm, many problems.

This morning men told me a woman was found under a bunk in the men's dorm. They saw her feet and at first said, "Sir", then realized it was a woman. One of the men told me it was due to a problem in the women's dorm. It could have been the crazy behavior, the noise or bullying. I don't know. She may have been trying to get some sleep there since the women's dorm is so loud or maybe felt safe with her husband in there. Does she have PTSD? I understand if she does. I told them after last night, hey that sounds like a good idea, maybe I could get some sleep by hiding under a bunk in the men's dorm. When I come in tonight and they ask me my bed number I'm going to say, under a bunk in the men's dorm. Hehe.

I was bullied night before last as I wrote in the last post upon trying to get an un-contaminated towel for showering. Last night being exhausted both physically and emotionally I decided not to ask for a towel and brought a wash cloth to dry the important parts off but would mostly just stay wet and just put on my pajamas. That is how bad it is there, that I would go without a towel to avoid contact with the bullies. Sometimes I enjoy their bully show, but with the lack of sleep and the ME/cfs brain fog that results I just need to lay down, but can't. The staff in charge asked me if I wanted a towel and I told him my plan, he gave me an un-contaminated towel with no bullying. Thank you!

After another nightmare night and having heard more sad stories about thrown away possessions etc. I was not doing well. I got on a bus to go get some new ear plugs at Walmart, I almost fell down a couple times due to the neurological symptoms and dropped things all over the place I now have the POTS tachycardia. I threw up in the bathroom. After getting off the bus I went to Albertsons which was right by the bus stop to get vegetables for my health and a couple other things. My day got more disturbing.

This is the bag I take to the shelter. That is a baggie with a used wash cloth in it and a roll of garbage bags under it. I was accused at Albertsons of it being lunch meant, in other words accused of shoplifting. I am a good customer there, why treat me like that?

The police told me being accused by a store of shoplifting is not a crime in Idaho, it is in some other states. So as per usual I am completely on my own. I was very distraught so he advised me to contact CWA for some resources. That is the Children and Women's Alliance. I explained that even though the Interfaith Sanctuary is domestic violence that I would not qualify. I told him I had gone over there for trauma counseling and that I had a history of a huge amount of trauma. When the counselor who I liked left I was referred to another one. I always make sure since this is a red state they know I am a liberal, not a Democrat, a real liberal so if they are right wing our time is not wasted. If you think it should not matter, you have no idea about social workers, prejudice and gossiping about clients. She told me what my other counselor did was not therapy, but it was and exactly what I needed, especially the contact with such a lovely person. That counselor I was referred to and came in to see if we were compatible went on to explain that I did not need counseling because I am resourceful and read. Yes, she did. Trying to get counseling for trauma is just about impossible in the United States if the person with PTSD is low income. Certainly, the ongoing constant trauma at the shelter is intentional and causes much harm not just to the direct target but also the observers. The treatment that works the best for PTSD is taking control of your life back, when living in a hellish homeless shelter of bullying and abuse where they make massive constant rules and not knowing from day to day what crazy things will happen or if you will be thrown out makes the PTSD much worse. You do not actually have to do something wrong to be thrown out.

Considering what I went through in Alaska being falsely accused and wrongfully imprisoned which resulted in my cat being starved and torture, my property being stolen or put out in the rain and my being forced into homelessness while being the victim of multiple crimes; the accusation at Albertsons today has caused me to cry most of the day and after the abuse at the shelter this has put me into shock. When I recover there will be hell to pay all around.

From August of 2014:

Six years ago [now 8 years ago] I was arrested for something I did not do. It was a conspiracy out of the Nome system of backwards injustice. Think small town in Mississippi in the 1950s, but brown people instead of black. As time goes by there is more understanding of the events because truth floats, even though they lie and cover it up. Those who do wrong use and hurt others to cover their crimes and bad behavior. I wonder how high up it went and if this severe abuse of power was done in an attempt to shut me up about what went on at Norton Sound Regional Hospital and the treatment of the Native people in that region. The Department of Law (attorney general's office) has their fingers in everything in Alaska and told Half-Governor Palin's staff not to talk to me or help me with anything. Filing the appeal was the trigger because the hearing I was not invited to attend happened three days later. Another factor is some of the players may have been bucking for a political appointment or promotions which in many cases did happen.

This was not what I intended to publish today, but the barrage of crazy abusive treatment for the homeless never ever stops and my abuse is quite bad due to my communicating my experiences and observations.

It's Joe Albertson's supermarket and the wrongful accusations are free. 

 counseling for trauma due to my being resourceful and because I read, yes she said that to a woman who was an RN that worked some as a supervisor in an adult acute psych unit, but all nursing has psych. I have had many strange encounters trying to get counseling for PTSD, it is just impossible.

Not looking forward to another night of no sleep. No peace, no sleep,. "I'm a human being God dammit, my life has value."

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