Abuse, Harassment, Menacing, No Sleep, Shaking Bed Due to Visitors In The Bed Under Me

Each night I get into bed hoping to be able to go to sleep as early as possible due to being severely sleep deprived for weeks from my bunk being shook through most of the nights. It’s like being at sea during a storm or an earthquake.

I have been so severely sleep deprived for weeks I can barely function and have fallen several times including while trying to get on a bus. I fell this morning while wearing a heavy backpack. My neurological symptoms have gotten very bad so I drop things constantly. I feel like I’m going to die. On multiple occasions, I have complained about this problem and no intervention was taken, but instead I was bullied by staff and lies were told about me. She wakes up at about 1:30 or 2 AM and the bed starts rocking. A couple weeks ago, a nearby person in the dorm says she watches the bed and it looks like an earthquake to her the way the bed moves.

Me/cfs has hundreds of symptoms which is why almost no doctor knows a thing about it. One of the symptoms is a chronic sore throat. I also have Interstitial Cystitis. Imagine being in a homeless shelter with these health issues. The cough drops have menthol which make the symptoms of the IC worse, so I must limit them. On top of the normal ME/cfs sore throat are the allergic and vasomotor rhinitis symptoms caused by the shelter air. The women’s dorm is across from the laundry room, the machines are run 22 hours a day. Yes there is the noise. Often the bleach fumes from that or the mop buckets are very toxic and there are other toxic things in the air. The fans blow dust and cause vasomotor rhinitis as does bleach, so my symptoms get much worse, especially when my head is put down to go to sleep.

With ME/cfs we have frequent vascular headaches due to low blood volume and I can’t do most of the things needed to prevent them, migraines also cause a running nose which makes the sore throat worse. Long ago I explained to staff why I can’t use very many cough drops so substitute hard candies. I was told that was not a problem. Everything is fluid at the Interfaith Sanctuary, today this is the rule, tomorrow it’s that and oh yea we aren’t going to tell you of the change, the rules only apply to certain people and in my case, are either eliminated or added to try and run me out of the shelter. ADA is not abided unless the person has some kind of gear. All those with invisible disabilities are not believed even when a note is brought from a doctor, an ADA violation. Anything that involves the germ theory of disease appears to violate their policies.  

I was almost asleep when two staff came into the dorm and were next to the beds. At first it seemed they were looking at her, then I realized they are talking to me but I had ear plugs in and take one out. I am asked if I am eating candy. Immediately I know where that came from. That person below me use to bring food in and pile it on her bed and has been harassing me about my sore throat treatments while I ignored her. I did not inform on her for having food as there are more pressing issues due to her severe behavior problems and the horrible odor she gives off, but she probably thinks I did. While she is eating she doesn’t talk. I doubt the staff noticed the food themselves as they miss things like gallon size water jugs. Yes, that was quite hilarious and I did demonstrate how a woman was drinking out of it with two hands holding it. The things that go on are hard to believe but true.

Then there were the two younger men on staff treating me, the older woman, one of the few who is not in the adolescent stage of development in that dorm like a child after I complained about her abuse over a period of weeks and told them I was just ignoring her. They were clueless as to what had been going on or that this woman is a sociopath and probably has a second personality disorder. I had been ignoring her behavior over a long period of time and had informed staff she was trying to start trouble which she has done with many people. They in fact moved someone away from her because they are clueless and thought the other woman was the problem. At the Interfaith Sanctuary, the person who reports the problem is to be targeted, the problem is OK with them. She is very menacing and nasty. Nothing was done about it. I continued to just ignore her and had to endure the torture every night of not being able to sleep, being called foul names, being menaced and gagged by her odor. I explain to the two staff what I am using the hard candies for to coat my throat so I can go to sleep if the bed ever stops shaking. I then became infuriated at how they were treating me after this all could go on over a period of weeks and told them every night she wakes me between 1:30 AM and 4 AM or several times shaking the bed for hours, then in the morning when I get up she calls me a fucking bitch. She also comes in and stands looking at me and my bed as if she is looking for something or just stands there staring at me in a menacing way.

If other women are around she calls me foul names and tells them all kinds of illogical crap that makes no sense trying to start something and acts in a menacing way. I just ignored her, but I have been warned she has a history of assault. Night before last when the staff did her bidding to harass me they gave her license to escalate this behavior. I explained that to them but even now doubt that they get it. Why would I be surprised by this when for many months they allowed me to be mobbed by a group of women last winter. Why would I be surprised when those in the higher positions at the shelter have also bullied me and it has been recent including last night.

When her stunt did not result in my being removed from my bunk so she could be free of me reporting the bed shaking she intentionally kept me awake all night. Last night along with lots of other inappropriate comments Dan Ault told me that I was living with 22 other women in the dorm as if it was me that was the problem and just complaining about normal stuff because he can’t listen, take action or make an appropriate decision, he can only bully me.

I got up at one point to tell the night shift staff what was going on and how pissed I was. There was no one there at the desk. I went to the bathroom and came back, still no one. This morning staff said she was there. I told her no she was not and there was another person there when I went to the desk and who he was. She said she was there when he was. No, she was not then, but he is at the desk a lot at night and she could have been in another place in the shelter. What I told her was the truth, I never lie.

Sunday morning this is what I saw when I got up. Keep in mind staff, including Dan Ault were told over a long period of time. 

 It may not have just been her mumbling.

On top of all of that for weeks this person had body odor to the point of my gagging and it was from a particular body part. I complained to staff over and over. After weeks one shower that I know of was taken. The odor was so bad that when the linens were stripped from the bed it was still there and lingered in the bathroom stalls she used as well. I did not tell this story for a very long time trying to be respectful even while being intentionally harmed and while the staff was neglectful, but after the obvious attempt to harm me last night and the staff facilitating it and being harassed by Dan Ault when I come into the shelter under the guise of helping me I decided to tell the whole truth.

Yesterday I attended a hearing in Bethel Alaska by phone to try and prevent a lawyer who harmed me from becoming their judge. I believed I would have to do this while the judge facilitating the hearing tried to stop me from telling the truth, so it was stressful, but he did not do that as he had in the last hearing. Being so sleep deprived I was afraid of how I would sound and was unable to say much due to being so sleep deprived. This is the second of four hearings. The first one happened Saturday while I was sleep deprived, but not as bad. There are two later this week and for one two of those who helped have me wrongfully imprisoned are trying to become judges. The way the shelter is run makes everything hard to do, causes anxiety and stress and traumatizes people. There are some very vulnerable people at that shelter who when bullied by these sociopaths just leave and stay outside even in the winter when it is freezing cold. I watched that last winter.

The civil cases I brought with me to try and get justice and turn around false negative issues with regard to housing were thrown away by the bad decisions of the staff at Interfaith Sanctuary due to treating the decent homeless as non-humans. That was years of work and hard fought for FOIA request results they stole from me. Rather than case management to help people get housing they instead make it much harder. The paperwork needed to rent a place to live also gets thrown out and the process to get everything replaced can be quite a bit of work, many have had their personal documents thrown away. This makes it hard for those looking for work as well. Then when I continue my fight by trying to stop those who harmed me in Alaska from harming others the shelter can’t even let me get some sleep. How on earth do they expect people to do anything, get housing, get a job, anything without sleep and while being constantly, CONSTANTLY emotionally abused. The Interfaith Sanctuary is constant severe domestic violence and it is worse for me than others. Many people end up homeless after being traumatized and then are traumatized at shelters over and over. Interfaith Sanctuary has two serial bullies on staff who have done this for years by their actions of lack of actions.

Last night this woman banged and tapped on the bed while shaking it. She screamed at other people in the dorm demanding they do as she said. She now wears some brace on her foot and uses a cane. I suspect this could be an act to get out of chores or manipulate as she has others make her bed for her. She has a cane, first she took someone else’s and staff had to get it from her. That cane is not a safe thing as she could easily become assaultive which should be something social workers would be able to determine but why is it they can’t? I was in danger and the staff did not care.

She wakes me very early, then I can’t go back to sleep so just wait until time to get up doing without sleep for weeks and weeks while the people who run the shelter are abusive if I complain about it. When I started getting my stuff together to get up she would harass me and call me foul names, every morning, sometimes even coming out into the main area later to continue making nasty remarks. The staff allowed this.

I have no idea what it was about but suddenly this morning there was yelling form the staff office. Someone asked if it was that woman and I said it sounded like her. It was unbelievable the things she was saying, you know just so much like what she has said to me for weeks. She was very aggressively yelling loudly and calling the staff the same foul names she called me for weeks. Then the staff tells her to leave the shelter and she is thrown out, to go get her stuff. She says, “I will not leave!” She leaves the office and goes to her bunk. I still had my stuff on mine and seeing as she is a sociopath I felt there was a danger of theft or damage, so went to stand by in the hallway. For some odd reason, she got one of her slaves to fold her blanket before she left which makes no sense unless she thinks Dan will protect her, so interesting. If that is the case it explains why she could harm me all this time.  I waited for her to get her stuff outside and leave the property before going outside with my things due to a possible assault.   

He told me to look for housing on Craigslist. Oh, I’m familiar with Craigslist and barnies aka customers of prostitution. I also have a fairly high IQ as I explained to Dan. But really, this is his magical plan for finding housing? I have been on Craigslist for years and have searched all over the country for housing. Over the last year in Boise I used Craigslist so I can explain that at the library they often get blocked. I used Craigslist to track a psychopath who stole from me several different ways, helped set me up to be wrongfully imprisoned, starved and tortured my cat and facilitated his brother file a false police report and perjure himself in court, it worked great. I also got screen shots of his ads for prostitution and posted them on line from Craigslist. The police in Homer Alaska thought I was crazy when I told them he was involved in prostitution and used Craigslist, yep they are either customers or very slow. The slow part is well documented.

Dan does this psycho thing when I come in where he harasses me for about twenty minutes saying the same things over and over. He use to follow me down the little hallway saying those things when no one else was there until one day I yelled, “If you think that you’re delusional” and “Stop being crazy.” That was the same hall he punched a homeless man in wasn’t it, but I was not a witness until the man came outside and called the cops, guess he got thrown out since they don’t allow use to call the police, especially after being assaulted by staff. He was talking to dispatch, “Yea, Dan assaulted me” as blood dripped off him. What I said to people was I expected to be the one he assaulted but my vagina must have protected me.

Yesterday the same staff that was on this morning when I complained about the behaviors and that the staff must be condoning it said none of them would condone that. Then I said why was something not done about it, no response. Then I said it was certain Dan was condoning it and she tells me that she knew Dan and he did not. Yes, Dan and other staff do condone it otherwise they would have done something. Action was only taken when she targeted another person, then she was thrown out due to her behavior towards the staff. That first night something should have been done. Things are not right at that shelter, nor are they safe. Dan likes to harass me by saying, “Celia, I’m so happy you feel safe to come back and stay here.” Dan is not happy I am there which is why he harasses me. I tell him no it is not safe, then I get told I can go to City of Lights or he wants to know why I come back. I say, “I’m homeless and this is the homeless shelter.” He has done this crazy crap for months. Now he is on some kick of harassing me about finding housing. He says illogical things about how he finds so much housing. Housing is easy to find, finding low income housing not so much, finding housing for those with social disabilities in Boise Idaho is nearly impossible. I ask him for a list, none is given. Last night he says he is reluctant to give people housing information unless they are in case management. I’ve been in their case management, no thanks.  I told him she is a sociopath but he might not know what that means because he’s a social worker. Hehe. I have social worker stories that will make your hair curl. Crazy stuff.

Dan dismissed my complaints about not sleeping that it had affected my health or that I had caught three viruses from her in a two-week period due to her poor personal hygiene. They like to gaslight a t that shelter, more on this later. When I told Dan I was sick he sarcastically goes, “Always, always.” What an ass. I have ME/cfs and live in pathogens. The policies of that shelter are part of the problem.

There is a clique of people from the Cooper Court tents who come into the shelter in the winter if they are not in prison. They cause all kinds of problems and among them are several sociopaths. When they arrive, the rules are not followed, the staff does not enforce them and they abuse the decent people. One of them kept coming into the women’s dorm last night yelling and carrying on when the rule is if one does not have a bed in there to stay out. That rule is enforced for others but not for them. It was a nightmare last winter. Some of the Cooper Court people were decent people, disabled and with other issues, but some are a big problem. When the old director of Interfaith Sanctuary felt the Cooper Court people were dangerous I now understand what she meant. They let her menace me for weeks. If I am assaulted by this woman there is going to be hell to pay.

Last night when I went into the Conex box where the lockers are this woman and her clique were in there and she began to call me all kinds of names and said things about me drinking coffee in the main area in the morning. It was the same stuff she says to me, but she was louder due to her clique that she controls being there. She said this, “She gets up at 5 AM and sits in the lobby drinking fucking coffee.” I know how could I do such a thing, someone call the police immediately. This was all she could come up with about me for bullying. I don’t get up at 5 AM, it is 5:15 AM unless I oversleep which never happens with her and I may have already been awake for hours before this time due to her shaking the bed.

This morning while I was sitting “in the lobby drinking fucking coffee” a woman whose bed is in a spot to observe what goes on told me why the bed shakes. She has woman who get into the bed with her in the middle of the night. I said that explains it. It is really gross considering the odor wafting. They let this go on for weeks, I couldn’t see it due to it being below me. I did see women kind of duck down towards her bed but thought they were talking to her. OMG! There was a problem over in the family side not too long ago of people doing things one would not do in front of others or sleeping in a room with others and especially when children are present. It went on for quite a while without them being believed. Then they changed the double beds to singles. Telling the truth and not being believed is a chronic problem at Interfaith Sanctuary. Telling the truth and being gaslighted there is quite pathological. 

Yesterday I questioned someone at BPD about the definition of harassment in Idaho. Then I said I would call them when it got really bad again. It was bad this morning and the staff told me if I called the police I would be thrown out of the shelter. They do not do their job, allow harassment, menacing and more but we can't even call the police without retaliation? Is that even legal? 

 

 

The Abuse Continues at the Interfaith Sanctuary While They Spin Propaganda in the Newspaper

I have informed the staff at the Interfaith Sanctuary that due to their abuse I will now tell the raw truth about what goes on there and I have written about it for a year. How I was treated last night and not being able to sleep last night due to their bad decision and lack of knowledge were my turning point. I had already been sleep deprived for weeks, had three viruses in the last two weeks and was in a lot of pain, thanks for making everything worse and destroying my chances for justice and housing Dan. Truth wins. I will be retaliated against but I am the most courageous woman I know.

Checking Into the Shelter at Night, Homeless People's Property Thrown Out, Craziness, a Death Outside, Some Changes Helped

Keep in mind that everything that must be done when homeless takes a huge amount of time which steals the life of the homeless person over to a system designed often from lack of empathy and logic. Then remember the homeless are often waiting for the next trauma, dreading it and this is why people sleep outside and in cars. Someone apparently died last night very close to the shelter, probably from the cold while intoxicated. A couple days ago I saw the police trying to get people to go into the shelters early in the morning. I said the reason they sleep outside is the shelters are hellholes. Some got tickets and it is cold here now so not safe outside. I think I know who the man was and I feel bad because after calling adult protective services so much and getting told various reasons they could do nothing to help the person I did not call about him. I noticed a man with a big bottle a couple days before and thought if he keeps drinking out here he is going to die, the cops saw him and it was morning so I left it to them. I know it would not have resulted in him getting help if I called APS, but what I know is always do the right thing because there is some comfort in having done what you could even if the result was not good.

Somewhere in the process of checking into the shelter I have to obtain a coffee cup for the morning before the volunteer touches it or writes on it. Their hands have been all over. If you don’t get one at night and keep it until morning you can’t have coffee unless you have something else to drink out of and they will not allow one to bring their own cup into the dorms, so you would have to go out to your locker in the cold to get it. A volunteer tattled on me for refusing to have my cup further cultured with the bacteria from her hands.Then I stick it in my shirt, bra or jacket so I do not drop it.

Many people who are homeless have addiction issues, are mentally ill, have dementia, or intellectual impairments or more than one of these issues along with the constant trauma of being homeless causing cognitive problems, especially short term memory issues. Yes, they take people who already have cognitive problems and make them worse through the constant trauma and abuse, but this causes cognitive damage to people who are normal, so just imagine how hard it is to even function to get through one day homeless. The way the Interfaith Shelter is run causes massive trauma over and over for the people who aren't in the good ole boys club. For some remembering to get a damn paper cup at night is too much. In the morning several people dig paper cups out of the garbage, some don't even bother to rinse them before drinking out of them. Then of course that hand which was digging in the garbage touches the toggle on the coffee pot and more.

We talk about our problems with not being able to even remember what we need to bring in to shower due to the crazy way things are set up there causing trauma and stress, then there are the ever changing rules, the random bullying sessions targeting certain people like me. It happens every night and last night I forgot not to bring something in yet due to needing to put linens on my bunk first. We also drop things constantly due to the stress. I also have neurological problems due to ME/cfs that cause me to drop things getting worse and worse, along with being dizzy and falling down. Sometimes I trip and fall on the sidewalk, but the other day I fell while getting on a bus. I was just thankful I did not land on my face again.

When one goes into the shelter there could be bullying or confrontation about your pajamas or personal hygiene items, imagine having to live like that never knowing what will happen or if you will be abused. If it isn't the staff it's someone staying at the shelter who has a personality disorder harassing you for some crazy reason. 

I was confronted for the high crime of putting my flip-flops in a plastic baggie, but serious problems are completely ignored or not even noticed. Telling them about serious problems results in anger or gaslighting. My rationale aka common sense reason for putting my flip flops in a separate baggie would be using a multiuse shower with a population that has some who rarely bathe, may have vermin and common reasons such as fungus or coliform bacteria. There are also toxic chemicals used to clean the shower room and I have mitochondrial dysfunction. Homeless people get diarrhea often due to the horrible diet, being exposed to pathogens and some are in withdrawal from narcotics on and off. Just a week ago Monday I spent about two hours in the middle of the night throwing up and having diarrhea, then I had to clean the mess up while so dizzy I have no idea how I stayed upright. Normally when this happens to me I get so dehydrated I can't stand and must go to the ER for IV fluids. That day I used a salt shaker that flowed too fast and took in a lot of salt, that probably kept me from the ER that night by causing my body to retain fluids. Now I have an upper respiratory infection. I believe both of these viruses came from the same rarely bathed source due to the poor hygiene decisions made at the shelter.

They use cards now to check us in, I am inmate number 117 in hell. We have to carry a card which shows we are homeless non-humans. Imagine having that in your wallet. People who often loose their possessions have lost those cards and have to pay $1 to get into the shelter to replace it, one guy told me he had lost his four times. When they hold the card to check me in having held a large number of other cards whatever germs were on the other cards are on the hands of the staff and now my card is contaminated. Some of them now just have me hold it up but if not I clean it with an alcohol wipe and if I forget one wash it. It’s like having unprotected sex with someone, you know that saying about having sex with all the other people that person has had. 

Then I go and sign up for a shower and in the past had to stand there for a while because we were not allowed to take one step to grab a towel from a plastic bin even if they are watching us. Now they put them in a metal cupboard. I don't want the same contaminated hands on the towel that touched everything else. Some were pushing the plastic bin, some even ventured to tell me to take one step, but then a rule was made they can't move the plastic bin so I asked them to grab it with a tissue. They prefer to use their gloves which ha been contaminated and so only serve to protect the wearer from pathogens not what they touch. Sometimes there are four or five of them mostly doing nothing behind the desk and the wait is quite long. They also give me nasty looks and comments about not wanting them to touch the towel. One night one of the students who is a bully saw a volunteer move the plastic bin as I told him they had made a rule against it. She was rather nasty and threatening accusing me of doing something wrong which is a lie. She is learning from the two serial bullies how to target people, demonize them and manufacture lies about them. She said, "Tim is going to come and talk to you about it." Tim never showed up. It was really sick.

 Next I go to my bunk and leave some stuff. I may chat with someone for a minute, then go to the shower room. We use to have quite a crazy back up in there but it is better now that some of the women are allowed to not bathe. You can't even imagine the stench. The combination of the most foul vaginal odor, old pee and body odor wafting from their bunk, above or next to you. You may have trouble sleeping or wake up gagging from it. Each time you walk by the air current you create makes it worse. Women can be in this olfactory damaging condition for weeks even wearing the same filthy clothing while the staff does nothing and make statements about how they can't make people shower. Having extra plastic bags and confabulating about me seem to be of much more interest. 

After the shower I have to take my shower stuff and dirty clothes outside to my locker and get clean clothes and my bag of stuff for the night. Every time I get sick more stuff gets crammed into the bag. We can't go into the lockers to get something after 9 PM so I bring what I might need. I might also grab a book, but the dorm is so crazy it makes reading hard, but I try sometimes. Then the dorm is like a junior high slumber party, I can use headphones or ear plugs and sometimes both, even with lights out or early in the morning someone will be talking on their phone. I have several sleep disorders and generally am already awake but others are trying to sleep. It's just amazing to me when they do things like that. In the morning I get awakened several times from inside the dorm and outside. At a particular time I get my crap together, make my bunk as best I can and get up. Then get a fold up chair and wipe it down with just water in case food got on it. It's dark in the main room and men are sleeping on the floor. Then I wait for the coffee pot to be brought out. When it is those who are up go to the pot and hilariously never manage to form a line. This morning I said we just form an impression of a line, but somehow it seems to work.

This shelter does not even have hand washing signs in the bathrooms. I saw a fabulous sign in the bathroom at the Women’s and Children’s Alliance and they gave me one to bring to the Interfaith Sanctuary. They have not requested any apparently as it has been weeks and nada. They could simply print instructions on a piece of paper to attach to the wall with pictures of germs on them or whatever. They could also have someone teach a class to the homeless people about why hand washing and other actions would help prevent infections. When I got there over a year ago they only had one soap dispenser in the women’s bathroom, then after a few months there were three. Women walk around barefoot, drop their clothing on the floor in the bathroom stalls and the wear them again. Many do not even wash their hands after using the toilet. But not teaching them to use a paper towel to open the stalls or at least to open the door to the bathroom means even those who do wash their hands are re-contaminated. They allow jackets, etc. to be hung on the top bunks which often causes that clothing to come into contact with the other person’s bedding and even if it doesn't as the hours go by the bacteria divide and migrate onto the bedding. Some people don't wash their jackets and sit on sidewalks etc. 

Last winter there were two women I know of who became septic with bacterial infections, it is likely there were more and I have no information about the men. I had one virus after another often bronchospasming all night. Many had pneumonia and bronchitis. Add the fans they had running all last winter, the bleach fumes and laundry detergent/cleaning supplies and there were allergies and vasomotor rhinitis symptoms on top of the viruses. It was awful and the coughing keeps people awake. The majority smoke but even those who do not smoke have to breathe cigarette smoke. Things have changed so I have to breathe less of it than last winter. They changed the blankets so the women who demanded the fans be on all winter while they were insanely under big comforters are now not wanting those fans on now. It was crazyiness. They complained they were hot and wanted the damn fans on while they were under this big hot comforter. Of course they were hot, take the damn thing off. So that has helped with the coughing.

Easy spreading of pathogens is due to being packed inside a shelter with all those people exposed to every infectious virus going around the community. The day shelter is way worse as far as people all packed together and has Dyson hand blowers which spread germs like crazy. There are people who flush the paper towels down the toilets causing massive plumbing problems so they stopped having paper towels which is the best way to prevent transfer of germs. I don’t go over there anymore to protect myself from lots of things but of course am in the night shelter with those who do. I believe I had a viral sepsis last winter and was very close to dying and health care was horrid. Health care providers know nothing about ME/cfs so they are horrible to us.

The issue about not being able to separate things like flip-flops with plastic bags contributes to the spreading of germs. One plastic bag is all that is allowed, flip-flops must be put against all toiletry items in the bag and things that need to be dry are wet due to lack of separation. The poor nutrition, the trauma, the alcoholism and the physical harshness of being homeless all contribute to the large amount of viruses that run through the population. When people are living on the edge of society and treated like garbage they become depressed and then stop caring about basic hygiene as each day the goal is just to survive. Those running the shelter have no problem with spreading pathogens from person to person and especially have to concern for those with immune system problems.

The person in this post with the hygiene issue is no longer in Idaho, but the same situation is playing out in others over and over. This is not about my current bunkmate. At this point probably all but two women will not know who this is so even though there are many stories and certainly ongoing ones I'm using this one. This post also demonstrates how the rules change without anyone being told and how property of the homeless gets thrown out.

Written June 16th 2016:

Ended up going back to the shelter late as I was working on something. The horribly smelling woman did not lose her bed for not doing a chore. Remember how they tried to take my bed when I had done a chore and actually had done lots of extra? Remember how I was not believed? Remember how it traumatized me and I dropped my pajamas in the garbage and then had to wear them? Then yesterday only 3 out of 7 stayed to do chores, two of us did extra, none of them lost their beds. It is also supposed to be mandatory to take a shower on chore day, not a problem, I take one every day. That woman below me did not take a shower. The odor was horrific. So I get up to complain about it again and I am not the only one who does. The supervisor tells me they have her in case management to try and work the issues out. Well they have been throwing mentally ill women outside who just lived like animals while I called agencies and ranted at the clinic for the homeless people. I also protected one of them from being thrown out of a business. [It was way more than one I protected]
They gave all those who skipped out on chores night chores to do supposedly. I sure as hell hope she did not serve the gruel; people would be retching. I don’t know as I arrived late. The supervisor told me she would make sure she showers, I said she would just put the same filthy clothing back on which smells horrid. I went over how myself and another woman tried to help her, were nice to her and she just will not do any personal hygiene nor go get free clothing. I gave her some jeans. Apparently she has clothes in her plastic bin but will not wear them. It seems like she is faking some of the crazy behaviors and the woman who put her ass on my bed etc. is her friend, so those two may be running some kind of con. She acts like she is an idiot but is on her cell phone all night long. I don’t know WTH the deal is with her or the shelter. So I say to the supervisor, so you aren’t throwing people out for not doing chores now? She says she doesn’t want her on the street. Then I go, so rather than traumatize people you are case managing and giving them night chores? Yes, she says. Now next week they may be back to throwing people out and threatening them, but this is actually a positive thing.
Yesterday morning I forgot to mention something that happened. When I went out to put my stuff away etc. before chores A woman was on a chair getting her stuff out of the dumpster. I said, “Did they throw your stuff away?” Yes, she says and I say “those bastards” and that I am sorry it happened. Then as I am getting ready to do chores this guy who was assigned to the storage room and electronics deal comes in and says a woman is getting her stuff out of the dumpster. I say to him, “Why would you tell them that?” Then as they start to go out and stop her I begin chanting all by myself, “LEAVE HER ALONE” over and over. It was an automatic single person protest and I’m kind of proud of it. Their eyes got really big. The guy that reported it starts saying to me, “I’m not a bad person”, explaining they told him he had to tell them. I then say they do lots of evil things to people and I refuse to go along with it, here is what you can say, “No, I’m not doing that.” Last night he mentioned the black woman he had reported, then I go, so there were two, the one I saw was white. Those assholes. We started talking and I realized he thought the stuff thrown away had been abandoned by people who were gone three days. No I told him they throw property of people who are staying here away all the time and that includes mine, my suitcase with important court cases in it. They’re complete bastards. You should have seen the look on his face, he had no idea. Man have I got some big ovaries.
Not feeling well and have not been for quite some time. Doing the best I can with what I know to get better, but the issues that are causing it are out of my control. The only thing I can control is doing the next right thing. I can’t emphasize how much comfort selecting my actions this way gives me because whatever happens I know I did what I could or that I made the best choice given the situation. 

The trauma of it all accumulates and most of us were already traumatized before we became homeless. The staff at most homeless shelters are not trauma-aware and most don't have the education to understand what that means. It seems that even most of the social workers think it is OK to throw personal property away, bully people, cause emotional damage. Last winter I watched the horror show as they threw those with mental illness or dementia outside at night or threaten those who speak up with being sent to a shelter filled with religiosity. There were some I would go looking for in the morning and sometime they were in bad shape. Often I found them at Albertsons trying to get warmed up, falling asleep or about the be thrown out. I got coffee and put it in front of them so staff would let them stay a while. I can't do that now, so hope the same scenarios are not happening. This winter I do not go to Albertsons due to being falsely accused of shoplifting, but worse than that accusation was how the director of the store and the headquarters treated me when I complained. It is quite unfortunate there are so many Albertsons stores in Boise. This has made my life even harder. What I was at Albertsons was a good customer and there are employee who know that, but the attitudes toward the homeless as always distort truth and logic. 

Repost From My Other Blog Related to Fight for Same Issue at Interfaith Sanctuary: Streptococcus A emm type 26 Outbreak Related to Homeless and Brother Francis Shelter, Very Disturbing

This is a repost from my other blog about a shelter in Anchorage where they did not understand the germ theory of disease, just like at the Interfaith Sanctuary. I worked hard to prevent something like this from happening. So sad, heartbroken, so disturbed by my country. These are Alaska Natives who of course have generational trauma issues already.

I am VERY ANGRY AND UPSET about the Streptococcus A emm type 26 (a Group A Strep, GAS) outbreak among the homeless Native people in Anchorage and Fairbanks with 28 affected and 4 dead. I tried to get something done about conditions at Brother Francis Shelter that may have helped create this new strain and was not treated well by anyone. Of course it may have come from Alaska Native Medical Center and then been spread. It was first found in Fairbanks but the Natives go to a shelter in Fairbanks when they get fed up with BFS, then come back. I tried to get rid of those who were running that nightmare and those in power protected them. I will post about what was going on and what happened today with being ignored again tomorrow. This is what I wrote before that is related. I'm too upset to do more than this. Now I will go back to the Interfaith Sanctuary in Boise Idaho and be treated poorly for my understanding of the germ theory of disease by the staff.

It's The Anniversary Date of My Leaving Alaska Due Danger to My Health and Safety (Part 1)

The shelter was over run with bedbugs and as I discovered the blanket problem I was bit by bedbugs. Brother Francis Shelter was very unsafe. I have immune system problems but their procedures were so bad that everyone including those with the strongest immune systems were in danger of infectious diseases. I had been told over a long period of time by several people that they only washed the blankets once a week. I laughed because it was absurd and said even these people who run this abusive incompetent shelter would not do something that evil, dangerous and stupid. Finally, someone who not only had intact mentation but also was very honest told me this was true. I then watched what they were doing and asked the people who did the laundry many questions. My conclusion was they were only washing the blankets once a week and I was sickened. They put the blankets in the driers and heated them up to kill bedbugs and lice but did not wash them to help kill the microbes.

The shelter I am in now washes the bedding once a week and we get a blanket, a sheet and a pillow case, but that is appropriate because each person keeps that same linen to be used by just themselves. Today is linen changing day for the women, I stripped my bed and tonight will have to make it. If someone leaves the next person who is assigned the bed strips it or if they are on the floor the linens are put into the dirty linen barrels to be washed or if someone has incontinence or some other issues they get clean linens. The people on the floor take their linens when they get up and put them into a garbage bag with their name on it to use for a week, then they are washed.

At Brother Francis they have those prison boats in the dorms, but most of the people are on the floor. The dorm people keep their blankets which is all the people get at BFS, one blanket and I experienced a period of time when there were not enough blankets for everyone because staff let people steal a very large number of them right before their eyes. I of course told them it was going on and certainly it was written up more than once in the over 200 grievance forms I filled out. Then they began abusing me massively! The people on the floor are given a blanket, then in the morning they are all thrown on the floor in the laundry room in a pile. So imagine what is on those blankets after being on the body of a person all night, a person who may drag it on the floor or walk on it and other people may walk on it. There could be people blowing their noses on it or men masturbating into them, they may have pooped their pants or peed themselves. People could have open infected wounds, may have sat down outside on the filthy sidewalks, be wearing filthy clothing, not have bathed for months and there are lots of places they could have picked up bacteria and viruses. People could have foot fungus or venereal diseases, they most certainly could have viral illnesses and of course shelters are the worst place for catching them. The drier does kill some germs, but not even the majority of them. Yea this is really gross. Several times I had a blanket that smelled like pee and thought I must be imagining it because that blanket was washed, but no it was not and there was an area of the shelter where there were elderly men who were incontinent of urine which sometimes flowed off the mats onto the floor. I called it the hallway of pee. This is disturbing and homeless people are forced to live in these kinds of conditions while politicians and their staff tell happy little lies to cover up the truth. 

I could not believe they would do this even after the horrors I had been through there, even after they allowed someone to torture me and sabotage my health care. I was completely shocked that non-profits are completely unregulated. By now I have figured out homeless people are considered non-humans and certainly the government wants us to die as fast as possible so they let these non-profits running the shelters do as they please and take no action. I did ask the Anchorage Assembly and Mayor Berkowitz to get Catholic Social Services to court and remove them from the shelter before I even knew about the blankets, they refused and the same exact people who treat the homeless like animals are still in place. 

I had confronted a staff who came from Bean’s Café for a new position about the blankets who is a very nice lady so I hope she was able to affect some changes and she claimed she had no idea the blankets were only being washed once a week and said she was horrified too. Her solution, dah-ta-dah-dah…to wash the blankets three times a week. Yes that means the homeless are only exposed to body secretions and pathogens four days a week. Doesn’t that just make you feel clean, fresh and healthy? All homeless shelters were created with a severe deficit of washers and driers because who could have known there would be lots of laundry in a warehouse shelter packed like a sardine can. This is often used as an excuse. 

Homeless In Anchorage Alaska Part 4/The Sleepng Mats at Brother Francis Shelter Are Filthy and Much More

Counseling Cattle Call, PTSD, Rank Vaginas, Disrespect, Lies About Housing, So Sick of the BS

I tried to figure out how to put a bubble over the cat which says 'those bastards'.

Over the last year this was me writing about my experiences at the Interfaith Sanctuary. Sometimes I was too traumatized to write and sometimes too sick or both. Right now I am so sick of all of it, the bullying, the lies, the constantly changing rules, not being told the rules have changed, the gaslighting,the negative effects on my health, the lack of caring from city hall, the filth, the viruses, the noise, the women who don't bathe and have rank smelling vaginas that waft into my bunk causing gagging and the egocentric lack of common courtesy such as talking on their phones after lights out or early while others are trying to sleep. The noise level and the foul body odors in the dorm are just unbelievable, instead of talking many yell like they are putting on a show. Oh the drama over nothing or based on poor judgment. They have policies that spread the viruses quite efficiently, "That's how we've always done it." If I mention I have a defective immune system and so do others they immediately start discounting my concerns which are very valid.

Then there is the BS from the director Dan about how there is housing for the homeless all over Boise. He says he finds someone housing "every day." I asked for a list of those landlords, so far haven't gotten one. Then more BS. Since Dan was getting on my nerves I began giving him PTSD ranting versions of my stories so he asked me if I wanted counseling. Don't make me start the ranting stories about trying to get counseling for PTSD since 2005. I haven't even started about what happened in New Mexico or why I left Alaska a story that is very hard to believe but true. I saw a very good psycholigist here from Maryland, but the constant changing of my appointments and other issues ended that. I saw a lovely woman at CWA who left the agency, but the second one told me since I read books and was resourceful I did not need counseling, yea she really did say that to a former RN and while psych was not my primary specialty it was one of them. Total BS. This is what goes on.

The crazy community clinics in Alaska did not even call back in three places. The misdiagnoses because don't they always have those poorly trained social workers who don't have the education and experience to diagnose people in those clinics. They are utterly clueless. Then on top of it I have neurological issues that make sorting out what is going on the job of a psychiatrist, not an incompetent social worker or psychologist. Every place a different misdiagnosis, then the same story has played out here. I was suicidal  in Alaska for the second time which BTW is SOP due to the abuse and horrible conditions and what you have to observe happening to others, the corrupt government, the massive drunks and corrupt/inept law enforcement and the massive bullies. This social worker...get this...tells me it would be OK to hitch hike from Homer Alaska to Anchorage while suicidal because I was not young and beautiful. I said, "That's a crazy thing to say to a patient. She then bolted out of the room, never saw that crazy woman again, she is probably doing some crazy thing with a patient right now. I worked with psychopaths, some of them prey on older women and other types of predatory individuals target whoever they may see as vulnerable. I was trying to get to a program in Anchorage where to my surprise the psychiatrists were able to diagnose me with something that made sense. They also told me I needed to write a book, now I have material for two or three books. Having been a supervisor of an acute adult psych unit I was well aware of what my diagnoses were before going there and it is super obvious. But that does not stop hacks at the incompetent clinic for the homeless, Terry Reilly from making two misdiagnoses within five minutes of my arriving. Neither of them could have been made even if he had spent and hour with me while being way out of his area of expertise. They fired me as a patient and I will be writing more about that.

Dan told me this Affinity Inc has someone he can get me an appointment with and I ask if they have anything to do with Terry Reilly. He says no. Then the students tell me there is an appointment made for me on Monday at 8 AM. I had something to do that morning, but did not do it to go. I already knew it was probably going to not work out as nothing ever does with any of these agencies that "help" the homeless. I even told someone she will either not show up or be late and I can't take anymore of this crap. It is never about helping the homeless, it is about managing us, pathologizing us and criminalizing us. So I leave for a while and go back to the shelter a little early. While waiting, a few minutes before she was supposed to be there staff tells me she called to say she was coming. I ask what that means, is she going to be late...what? He doesn't know. I waited a while, then another person showed up obviously to meet with her. Then I say, "Oh, I see, this is a cattle call." And yes it was apparently more people showed up after I left saying, "How do I get out of this gulog?" I AM SO SICK OF BEING TREATED IN A DISRESPECTFUL WAY BY EVERYONE BECAUSE THE HOMELESS ARE NOT SEEN AS EVEN BEING HUMAN. I worked my whole life since high school with health problems until the abusive policies of this country and Alaska mostly affecting the Native people gave me PTSD.

What I needed long ago was housing and to not be exposed to the abuse and trauma that continues, layer upon layer here in 'Merica. I need to get the hell away from all these people who make very bad decisions that harm me. I need to do the things that treat ME/cfs, be able to sleep, eat healthy food, have some peace. I thought the problems in Alaska were due to it being backwards, but the same abuse, the same filth, the same lack of competent health care and the same lack of housing is here in Idaho. The treatment that works for PTSD is to give the person control of their life, but instead we get trauma piled on top of trauma for years on end. At the shelter we have no control, even though they put up a sign that says only we can control the rest of our lives.

The bad behavior of some of the women is not supervised so that limits choices even further. I have better judgment than all the staff put together, but am not allowed to make my own choices about housing, toxic chemicals, protecting myself from viruses, protecting myself from second hand cigarette smoke, protecting myself from sociopaths, toxic people and more. Even what I bring in for personal hygiene is controlled. I can't even use a hair drier. I cant write at night. I can't do the things I normally do, nothing. I can't even read a fucking book at night due to the junior high slumber party in the dorm every night and it has gotten horrible. There was a ban on books at one point, but that only lasted 24 hours. Can you even imagine such a thing? All this goes on while the rank va-jay-jay odor wafts into my bunk. I have complained about that odor every day for weeks now and it just gets worse. It has been an ongoing problem over the last year and the shower policy went from Nazi to nada without a word being said with regard to changing. Excusifying is the response to complaints.

I saw the police harassing people who were sleeping outside. One said they gave them tickets. That day I walked by and said to the cop the reason they are out here is the shelters are hell holes. There are other reasons people sleep in cars or outside, but day in and day out the craziness, the abuse and putting your property in danger of being thrown away or stolen makes the Interfaith Sanctuary a torture chamber of trauma. That shelter is crazy making. It makes mentally healthy people nuts, so imagine the effect it has on the mentally ill.

No social or revolutionary movement succeeds without a core of people who will not betray their vision and their principles. They are the building blocks of social change. They are our only hope for a viable socialism. They are willing to spend their lives as political outcasts. They are willing to endure repression. They will not sell out the oppressed and the poor. They know that you stand with all of the oppressed—people of color in our prisons and marginal communities, the poor, unemployed workers, our LGBT community, undocumented workers, the mentally ill and the Palestinians, Iraqis and Afghans whom we terrorize and murder—or you stand with none of the oppressed. They know when you fight for the oppressed you get treated like the oppressed. They know this is the cost of the moral life, a life that is not abandoned even if means you are destined to spend generations wandering in the wilderness, even if you are destined to fail. Chris Hedges

Harassment and Near Loss of Bed Due to Obvious Retaliation

The first part I took from a previous post on April 23rd, the rest was written on April 25th as posted.  April 25th is the day Judge Ben Esch or as I called him Judge Ex Parte Esch died, the judge from Nome Alaska who participated in a conspiracy to have me wrongfully arrested and imprisoned three days after I filed an appeal in a case of injustice. He was the judge who was found to have shown favortism in case of one of the Fairbanks Four, Eugene Vent. That was nothing compared to what he did in my case. On that day another type of injustice was attempted at the Interfaith Sanctuary.

Explanations of things I mention in the post:

The guy who says he will not discuss my suitcase is Dan who just last night feigned he couldn't even remember it. He also said that when I first came to the shelter I said I got everything I ever needed at the shelter in Alaska. See my previous post to understand that is most certainly not what I said. The social worker I refer to is Tim. I can't edit the errors as this is from screen shots. The story about the food and motorcycles was some biker club who came and had a barbecue. A bunch of us were in line and they suddenly just stopped serving food. They all got on their motorcycles to leave, revving them and she runs over to them because all men got attention from her and we were all looking at each other like what is going on. They then leave and she knows we were standing there in line for food and is dinking around. I ask her what is going on, that we are in line for the food and the guys left. She says they ran out of food and went to get more. I said no they didn't, they left and BTW they had. She just left us standing there, it was so bizarre. The fan bully was a woman who stayed up most of the night on her tablet, put a comforter over herself and turned a fan on her bed because she was too hot. The comforter was to hide the tablet. But I was in the bunk above her with a fan on the ceiling over me, so that second fan aimed at that fan caused a wind storm on my bunk causing nose bleeds, a sore throat, chapped lips etc. I complained about this for months and they took no action, in fact they didn't even take the time to come in and see what was going on in the middle of the night. There was other bullying that went on along with it from multiple women in the dorm with them frequently saying, "Snitches get stitiches." The staff knew about that too. They finally moved ME to another bed. I like that bed better and the snitches get stitches crap ended. There was a lot of threatening crap including a woman who would just talk crazy crap at me, they poured coffee on my plastic bins several times, pulled the duct tape off and put garbage on them. That went on for months.