Monday, December 19, 2016

Torture By Fan, Little Sleep, Mobbing, Bullying, Caused Pain, Illness

There is more to the story, it has been hell week at the Interfaith Sanctuary. Part of the problem with the flare up was a mentally ill woman being allowed to spray bleach all over the bathroom. The staff gaslighted me on that one too. Some of them are clueless and lack empathy yet are allowed to bully others and have power over their lives. Bleach can cause vasomotor rhinitis and most certainly chlorine is toxic. .As I keep saying, it is like Zimbardo's prison experiment and homeless shelters are essentially night prisons. The poor elderly, the disabled, the addicted, the intellectually impaired are subject to massive abuse, bullying and harm to their health.

For the last two days, a very large fan on the ceiling has been turned on and then aimed in the direction of the area I sleep in. Someone said it had been on the day before, but since it was not aimed at me I never noticed it. Night before last it was freezing cold in the dorm so I thought they had the doors to the laundry room opened. After a while I finally got up to see what was going on and someone told me it was the fan. I never noticed the fan because what kind of sadistic demon would turn on a fan when the temperature goes down in the single digits in the late hours and early morning. I could not have imagined such a thing. It was aimed at me and others in that area, and we have had much discussion in the past that the fan blowing on me causes vasomotor rhinitis, nose bleeds, vascular headaches and flares of CMV or other latent viruses, so they knew of the harm before it was turned on. It also keeps me from sleeping which contributes to the viral bloom. I have a chronic sore throat due to ME/cfs, causing my sinuses to run which makes it very painful. The blowing cold air also dries out nasal membranes making the uptake of viruses more likely. It can cause me to have a rather severe bloody nose­­­­­­.
Sleeping in an area where it is so windy that one must use chapstick is very strange. Having to wear jackets, hoods, hats like you are outside in a freezing cold dorm and being given just a plain blanket to cover yourself while blowing cold air all over when the dorm was already cold at night and can get very cold when they open the doors is sadistic. Announcing last night when they knew we were miserable that everyone can only have one blanket is the icing on the sadism.
They knew for at least two days that the fan was making people very cold. I asked staff to please at least turn it down to blow on the floor so it would not blow on people as it would make me very ill. No action was taken by the bullying, gaslighting staff. Both Tim and Dan knew last night at least and probably the day before. They took no action knowing it would make me sick and that the fan was making us cold. Others complained when staff was not there, but I am the one who has the courage to speak up, this makes me the target. When I complained to the staff she said to wear my jacket, not only did I have it on at the time, but we had been using our jackets to stay warmer before the damn fan was turned on. She also told me the fan was not blowing in my area, but it most certainly was, gaslighting 101. I gave her a simple solution of taking a broom and making the fan point down. She, a social work student at BSU decided to harm the health of others instead of doing something to help us. She has learned the SOP of the Interfaith Sanctuary from the two serial bullies in charge. This is not good for the community.
Dan suggested we wear sweatpants, jackets etc. He knew we were cold and the fan made us colder but that was just OK with him. He knew the fan would make me ill. In fact, yesterday when I woke up in pain I told the staff, I had already informed her at 12:30 AM and I got very little sleep for two nights. I left the shelter yesterday sobbing and that continued for hours due to the pain I was in, the exhaustion, the nausea and more, add the yearlong massive abusive treatment. Then I hid in the afternoon. I told them this and they left the fan on again last night. Then when I returned to the shelter I was mobbed because they are emotionally abusive and lack empathy.
I am now very ill and in a huge amount of pain. There are no regulations of homeless shelters in the United States, non-profits are unregulated and much abuse and safety issues go on. The non-profit industrial complex is allowed to harm the health of the homeless and with their abuse essentially kill people in many ways. Bullying, hypothermia, stress, pathogens (spread by fans, hands and in many other ways due to lack of understanding of the germ theory of disease and caring), lack of sleep, horrible health care, horrible food and the secondary symptom of trauma use of substances to kill the pain. There is massive cigarette smoking which is mostly unregulated so we are exposed to second hand smoke going in and out of the building and when we get in our lockers.
I was called into the office last night for a three on one mobbing while I had no witness or support. There was no warning that more people than Dan would be present. The student just sat there while Tim and Dan tried to intimidate me. I am an expert on bullying. They had a document with a list of rules they wanted me to sign, just like a bully boss would do with an evaluation or write up. It was so sick. For weeks Dan harassed me about case management as I came into the shelter. I have ME/cfs with POTS (postural tachycardia syndrome), I need to try to shower and go lay down, not be badgered. I have gone to some of their meetings and little gets done, one of them never showed for appointments, then in the end you find out they just want your personal information and have no help. As a homeless person I must walk all over and walking back to the shelter early to fill out one piece of paper is maddening. Dan told me he finds apartments on Craigslist…I know whoda thunk it. The problem is not finding them, it is getting people to rent to me. I have an incredible story of injustice and layer upon layer of trauma and the only reason I believe my story myself is having lived it.
 I have been abused so much by them there is no trust left at all. Their lack of respect and abuse destroyed my chances at justice and my attempt to prevent a malfeasant lawyer from becoming a judge. They would have to be insane after all they have done to harm me if they think I would have any trust in them at all. I do not have Stockholm Syndrome. What goes on at shelters is domestic violence, emotional abuse on steroids and they have no respect for the homeless. Why is this allowed?
Yesterday they announced we could come back to the shelter at 4:30 PM and I am very happy people have a place to go now, it is very cold. Last winter I was hypothermic several times and got frostbite on my toes. I could not believe Boise treated people like that. I kept falling due to the leg cramps, with ME/cfs we are susceptible to muscle tears and the cramping from the hypothermia tore my muscles.
 I was promised the fans would be off tongiht, but have been lied to so much my arrival will be later than that. Showing up early for more fan blowing would not be a good choice. They demanded I give an answer tonight to their attempts to get me into their case management. They got nothing. If they wanted to help me they could have done that long ago by helping me find housing, not throwing my civil cases in the dumpster and treating me like a non-human. They chose to bully me and torture me instead. By throwing out my civil cases they harmed my chances to get housing and tried to blame me for their actions. It was unconscionable.
I am a human being, a real person, intelligent, talented. I am homeless because people wanted me this way due to my being an ethical whistleblower and a political blogger, they still do. They wanted to hinder my ability to fight for justice and tell my stories. They knew with my health problems and then the added PTSD the abuse of the homeless shelters would likely kill me and they may be right
They announced in the newspaper that they do not require case management, but I was harassed for weeks and then the mobbing last night happened. They want access to my personal information including my SSDI. They want to force me into some budget to save money. I have a high IQ and have attempted to save money. Eating at soup kitchens is unhealthy most of the time and there are gastrointestinal issues there, then the massive sugar which causes large numbers of homeless people to develop diabetes mellitus. I must protect my health with supplements for ME/cfs and vegetables for the mitochondrial dysfunction of ME/cfs to try and not get sicker and stop them from killing me. They have tried to force their case management on others. Their actions have been the opposite of help for over a year, I could have used some help but all I got was abuse, illness and misery. Most of the homeless shelters are like this.
Now due to their actions I am very sick and hurting. They should be proud of themselves, once again their actions to harm me were successful. Now Leave me the fuck alone.

Friday, December 16, 2016

Interfaith Sanctuary Bullying Continues in a Most Illogical Way and the Crazy Continues

Some of the people at the shelter get up early, like normal people because we were not doing drugs or drinking the day before, some like to stay in bed until time to leave the shelter no matter their status, sometimes someone is still there after time to leave. Most of those who get up early were not up past lights out talking and making noise keeping others awake, we may have been awake however because of the noise. So we get up early and some go outside to smoke, some leave and some go into the main room to find a chair to sit in. I have ME/cfs with dizziness and nausea in the AM along with fatigue which is made worse by being kept awake and the horrible lifestyle I am forced to live as a homeless person in Boise Idaho. Sometimes it is staff in the hall or laundry room yelling and keeping us awake, this is true as hard as it is to imagine. They also open the doors to the laundry room which is directly across from the women’s dorm to get the buckets and mops so we freeze and that wakes us up. 

I am one of the people who goes to the main room early most days, unless I am sick or severely sleep deprived, so don’t wake up. I wipe a chair down with a wet tissue to at least get the food from the night before off. It’s generally dark. We try to be quiet but the chairs are uncooperative. The early risers wait until they bring out the coffee, it does not always appear, we were told one night the coffee pot was lost and it has been broken in the past. 

With ME/cfs we can have brain fog and it takes a larger amount of brain tissue to form a thought with us than normal people. That is one of the reasons for our fatigue, the brain has 20% of the mitochondria and my brain takes extra energy. This also explains my thinking process, if a thought takes a larger part of the brain to form it connects to more parts of the brain and accesses more memories. This explains why my stories are so detailed, the constant extra information that pops in from more than normal connections involved in the thought. Coffee helps with the fatigue and the nausea. The sitting helps with the nausea and dizziness because that is mainly due to low blood volume. I am not the only one who does not function well in the morning. It is hard enough without some staff trying to shame me for drinking coffee. Why?

When I asked the staff if this policy came from her as I expected she said yes, and haughtily said it was the polite thing to do. Really now? Considering all the unpolite things that go on this is what you are targeting? Coffee drinking? Really? In fact they allow a massive barrage of un-politeness which includes smoking in the Conex boxes where the lockers are which goes on even when children are present (fuck you is received if you ask them not to), people talking in the dorms at night, people intentionally slamming into others, people making nasty derogatory comments, horrible body odors from unwashed people that goes on for weeks, it is impossible to take a shower in the allotted ten minutes so most of us just hurry as fast as we can, but some go in there and stay a long time while we are lined up outside the door waiting, a woman called me a “fucking bitch” every morning when I got up, she also had other women in her bed at night shaking the bunk beds we shared like an earthquake so I had little sleep for weeks. These things went on and continue with little intervention, but drinking a fucking cup of coffee is what they pick as the unpolite activity. She wants to label the wrong people as being not polite just like Dan did when he announced months ago, to the crowded main room that I never say thank you, which is the complete opposite of the truth, a lie, a slander. 

Then there are all the other problems like one staff who goes psycho and starts screaming or talking to me like I’m an idiot. I am a very intelligent woman which is one of the reasons I’m homeless. If I was an idiot people would not have worked so hard to harm this truth teller/whistleblower and run her out of Alaska. Certainly, John Earthman the prosecutor in Nome Alaska would not have had me wrongfully imprisoned for filing an appeal with the help of a cadre of drunken public defenders if I was an idiot.  

The last few days have been crazy at the shelter with some disturbing and traumatic issues, including overflowing flooding toilets and I tried to mop the disgusting mess up but it kept flowing. A crazy unconscious person scenario to name just a couple. BTW, it is QUITE IMPOLITE, QUITE IRRESPONSIBLE, QUITE INCONSIDERATE, QUITE DAMAGING TO THE PROPERTY for women to put their insertion guides from their tampons, paper towels and other things in the toilets to plug up the pipes. Placing graffiti in a bathroom stall or ripping one of the doors off a stall is QUITE IMPOLITE, ok, those things are very assholey, but you get the point. These things go on but coffee drinking is the real problem for the staff at the shelter. 

FFS! The reason for this idiocy is bullying and some are serial bullies. This is a problem in most homeless shelters because they are essentially night prisons designed by the federal government's system, the non-profit industrial complex used to manage the homeless population and have the same old Zimbardo prison experiment problems as prisons. 
A night shift guy who just moved to the evening shift would bring the coffee out for the early risers then go turn the lights on to wake the others. We got a cup of coffee and dispersed so the coffee pot was cleared for those who woke up to come and easily get some. The difference in time was minutes but facilitated the flow of traffic, the way it is done now causes a very long line. Standing in line makes me more dizzy and nauseous and other have similar issues, that is why they drag their asses slowly and can barely get a folding chair to sit in.

This morning the night shift staff turned the lights on and made us stand there in line waiting while she went over to the family side. That was most certainly NOT POLITE of her, in fact it was very disrespectful. Then she announced we could only have one cup until everyone in the shelter had one. The people who want coffee get up and come get some. The lights were just turned on so they know the coffee is normally out, but not when this woman is in charge. She told the women who come out to get a cup of coffee they can’t take it back with them into the dorm, there are limited places to put a chair to sit and there are men on the floor having slept there all night in the same room. I would not take my coffee in the dorm as I have neurological issues that cause me to spill, so only water goes by my bunk. 

The crowding of course gets worse in the shelter when the weather is cold like right now. We get a chair and search for some little spot to put it where we are not in the way, but when it is so crowded this can be impossible. Sitting by the door right now doesn’t work due to a blast of freezing air every time it opens which is very frequent. 

While all this went on she allowed many people to bring purses, bags and backpacks into the shelter which is not allowed for several reasons and I don’t think she noticed even one of them. The exclusion of important enforcement of rules, while adding new rules to facilitate bullying has already begun with her. Interfaith Sanctuary SOP.

Just got an email about rapid re-housing for the homeless, you know something that does not happen and threw them back quite a rant. So sick of the lies.